Top 6 Wedding Moments I've Had

6) Terrible Songs- I dont know why every middle age woman who can play D G A on guitar decides they must perform at a wedding. At a wedding on the weekend a lady played while the couple was signing the registery. She proceeds to drop her mike, forget the words, and nearly crys in a train wreck attempt to perform. I wish someone would gently tell her maybe its not her time. The killer was she peforms again at the reception and proceeds to sing a depressing song about how the bride almost died at birth. Like I said, a train wreck.

5) The Casual Approach- While working at Homewood in the summer of 2007 I was invited to a wedding at the nd of summer. I really had no nice clothes to wear. I proceeded to wear shorts and a $12 button shirt from Old Navy. The groom loved me for it and I think the bride was ok, however, the brides mother was less than impressed. I could see in the receving line up that she judged me before I met her because of my questianble wedding attire. I later came to the conclusion that she is scary crazy.

4) The Wedding Road Trip_ Last summer going to Calgary was probably one of the biggest gong shows. We drove through the night in a '87 Volvo to Calgary and it was a grind. While in the other car there was a couple who came but were broken up. They wanted to keep up the appearance of being together so it made the whole weekend a little uncomfortable. While in Calgary I got a ticket for riding the C train without a ticket and the wedding just brought on more shenigens. Perhaps the most memorable thing I saw was my friend drinking from 2 wine bottles at once and that pretty much summed up the gong show weekend. However, it was fun none the less.

3) Being Late for Weddings- The wedding on the weekend I was at my friend and I thought it started at 330 when it really started at 3. As we walk in at 315 we figure we have lots of time but in reality were already late. We run past the groom and his groomsmen and wish them good lucl as the brides mon yells at us to get to our seats. Everything worked out and we werent the latest people there either.

2) CLA Weddings- Nothing is more classic than a CLA wedding. The classic ceremony in the ugly former orange pews of the sanctuary and then a stand up reception in the gym with finger food. What more is there to say other than the fact I cant imagine a place more unatrractive for a wedding. Im sorry, it had to be said.

1) The Quotes- Weddings bring about some of the greatest lines said. For instance telling the best man at the wedding that women and homosexuals drink wine with non-alcholic punch in them. Perhaps the greatest quote Ive ever heard was from a good friend of mine. While watching a slide show at a wedding and listening to the music people were emotional. I asked my friend if she was crying. She responded by saying, "We're not crying cause were sad, we're crying because were single." Pure Gold.